Thanks for this wonderful end-of-year meditation and invitation to capacity building.
One this part: "But habits should never become enduring so as to lose their lustre and become limiting rather than expansive forces in our lives." I see these sort of like whale songs, we can slowly shift our practices over time as needed to keep them appropriate to our needs. Somatics talks about an ever expanding spiral of human development that is based on understanding what we are currently practicing, and what we need to practice instead to grow into the shape we seek to become. We study our current habits, and then shift them over time. This means that later, our relatively newer habits are the ones that are again studied, and then shifted to what is needed next. Habits grow branches, some are pruned back, but the tree of our lives becomes larger and healthier over time.
Regarding “I intend to achieve X”—Gollwitzer, we get into the research of Richard Boyatzis et. al. on the shift from what he and his colleagues term "coaching for compliance" versus their coined approach "coaching from compassion" or "Intentional Change Theory." Which is to get out of our task-positive neural network (near term accomplishments, goals, judgements, closed mindset) to the default mode network (tend & befriend, forward-focus, open mindset). We do this by as both Gollwitzer, Boyatzis and Covey would say -- beginning with the vision of the bright attractive future ("begin with the end in mind"). Their research shows 65-85% efficacy of keeping the attention on this "positive emotional attractor" of our future visioin vs. 11% success rate or worse that comes from focusing only on consequences, "should" or what they term "negative emotional attractors". The three questions from TSA help here by focusing on positive outcomes.
Furthermore on Temporal Self Assessment Theory - backward-looking self assessment can become its own cul-de-sac. For instance spending decades rehashing our past in whatever modes of disbelief, self-blame, shame, judgement, regret, etc. By contrast, Buddhism holds there is no fixed identity, and every moment (and we in it) are fresh and new -- which both gives us the freedom to unlock our own mental/emotional cages while also handing us the radical responsibility to constantly reassess our assumptions, or simply practice setting our assumptions aside so that we may rise to whatever the present moment calls for in terms of response from us.
Amor fati is not only Nietzche's but also the saying of the Stoics - here he has a more positive bent to his appreciation of life - but from the stoics' standpoint it was to love *every* aspect, not just the beautiful; their discipline including somehow coming to love our dire hardships (the seemingly crueller side of our fate, was stripped of judgement and more than simply endured). What Buddhism would call equanimity. This is like Rabia al Basri's wonderful "I was born, when all I once feared, I could love." May we all reach such peace, and then act from it for the sake of the planet this coming year and all the years hence.
This is a great piece to put some perspective on new year resolutions. I can personally attest to the improved results of applying Houltberg and Uhalde's three questions to one's resolutions, even though I of course never knew anything about their theories at the time. I think we all apply the first question of hoping that our resolutions will meet our long term goals, and indeed most of us probably approach resolutions from a personal standpoint, but my own enlightenment comes from the third question which is to consider who else in this big wide deserving world might be positively affected by my own resolves and actions. Excellent.
Thanks for this wonderful end-of-year meditation and invitation to capacity building.
One this part: "But habits should never become enduring so as to lose their lustre and become limiting rather than expansive forces in our lives." I see these sort of like whale songs, we can slowly shift our practices over time as needed to keep them appropriate to our needs. Somatics talks about an ever expanding spiral of human development that is based on understanding what we are currently practicing, and what we need to practice instead to grow into the shape we seek to become. We study our current habits, and then shift them over time. This means that later, our relatively newer habits are the ones that are again studied, and then shifted to what is needed next. Habits grow branches, some are pruned back, but the tree of our lives becomes larger and healthier over time.
Regarding “I intend to achieve X”—Gollwitzer, we get into the research of Richard Boyatzis et. al. on the shift from what he and his colleagues term "coaching for compliance" versus their coined approach "coaching from compassion" or "Intentional Change Theory." Which is to get out of our task-positive neural network (near term accomplishments, goals, judgements, closed mindset) to the default mode network (tend & befriend, forward-focus, open mindset). We do this by as both Gollwitzer, Boyatzis and Covey would say -- beginning with the vision of the bright attractive future ("begin with the end in mind"). Their research shows 65-85% efficacy of keeping the attention on this "positive emotional attractor" of our future visioin vs. 11% success rate or worse that comes from focusing only on consequences, "should" or what they term "negative emotional attractors". The three questions from TSA help here by focusing on positive outcomes.
Furthermore on Temporal Self Assessment Theory - backward-looking self assessment can become its own cul-de-sac. For instance spending decades rehashing our past in whatever modes of disbelief, self-blame, shame, judgement, regret, etc. By contrast, Buddhism holds there is no fixed identity, and every moment (and we in it) are fresh and new -- which both gives us the freedom to unlock our own mental/emotional cages while also handing us the radical responsibility to constantly reassess our assumptions, or simply practice setting our assumptions aside so that we may rise to whatever the present moment calls for in terms of response from us.
Amor fati is not only Nietzche's but also the saying of the Stoics - here he has a more positive bent to his appreciation of life - but from the stoics' standpoint it was to love *every* aspect, not just the beautiful; their discipline including somehow coming to love our dire hardships (the seemingly crueller side of our fate, was stripped of judgement and more than simply endured). What Buddhism would call equanimity. This is like Rabia al Basri's wonderful "I was born, when all I once feared, I could love." May we all reach such peace, and then act from it for the sake of the planet this coming year and all the years hence.
This is a great piece to put some perspective on new year resolutions. I can personally attest to the improved results of applying Houltberg and Uhalde's three questions to one's resolutions, even though I of course never knew anything about their theories at the time. I think we all apply the first question of hoping that our resolutions will meet our long term goals, and indeed most of us probably approach resolutions from a personal standpoint, but my own enlightenment comes from the third question which is to consider who else in this big wide deserving world might be positively affected by my own resolves and actions. Excellent.
Thanks Adam !